Metanoia...#26challenges

 Metanoia (n) the journey of changing one's mind, heart, self, or way of life.

As usual it's been quite a while. I am obviously not very good at this blogging thing BUUTT now that I have gotten myself a new laptop [my birthday gift to myself] and I don't work two jobs anymore, I am better able to sit and write to my hearts content.

It's a new year, wow how time flies. I look forward to this year even though it started off sucky with my period coming & killer cramps, ugh. With this year brings new challenges which I am giving myself to break out of this cocoon that I have so masterfully created and am yet to shed and evolve into the person I know I can be. So as of my 26th birthday, I decided I would give myself 26 challenges to accomplish, some of which are goals I have set many times over and have yet to achieve, some of which are new & some of which I have weighed over in my mind many a times but never really brought myself to doing. All in all my main goal/ challenge is actually accomplishing all 26 because I am the queen of setting goals or saying I am going to do something, start it and then after a few days/week/months I do away with it and that's that.

One of my Christmas gifts was a journal, which because of the sap i am i cried over, for me to keep track of my challenges. Along with that journal, I will try and update also on my blog as I overcome these challenges, the trials I face and the feeling of gratitude, freedom, love and maybe some discomfort that I may face through it all. Some things a may not share in specific detail because of maybe how personal it may be to me and how it may probably affect someone else that it relates to, but I will be as honest as possible with everything.

Each goal set, are to help me break through barriers, to find peace, happiness, love and to be as realistic with myself while pushing myself past certain comfort zones. Meditation is one of the key factors in which I plan to get from one stage to the next. Allowing myself to accept all forms of abundance the universe has to offer me while releasing any and everything that tries to interfere with that.


Love always,
Mandi

Conversations that resonate: I complain too much

Today I was messaging a friend, the conversation went as follows:

Him: how r u?
Me: not bad
Him: yay
Me: lol OK then
Him: normally u complain about ur day...
Me: 😒 am I that bad?
Him: pretty bad

Honestly that hit me hard. Am I always complaining about something? Am I unbearable? Do I only speak negative about my days? Then I really thought about it & realized this may just be true. If I am not speaking some form of negativity I am thinking it. It's as if I never allow myself to be completely happy about something & constantly nitpick at my days &/or life. How horrible that is & how depressing. I speak about positivity & letting go of negative things and people yet I don't live a positive life, and this is true. I have the worst confidence in myself. I constantly doubt who I am, my talents and every situation. I am afraid to get excited about things cause I feel in the end it just won't be good & so it never is. I speak things into being & those things aren't always good.

So I am challenging myself to do better & be better. To speak positively & live positively. I have a friend who every time I rant about things and start doubting, she tells me to fill my thoughts of good things, of my blessings. I need to do this more. I won't be unrealistic about life because at the end of the day shit happens and you need to talk about it. I just won't make a habit out of speaking the bad stuff.

I also challenge you to do the same, make it be a habit to not dwell on the negative but to continually speak positivity into your life & to others.

Xoxo
Mandi

Still editing

As you can see my blog isn't yet complete. I am  still editing, and since it's all on me, no blog designer to help me out, I have to take it a step at a time. I am learning as I go along. It can be quite frustrating so kudos to all you Blog Designers.

Thank you for your patients & understanding.

Xoxo
Mandi

Labels!!!

I cannot believe I forgot to share my new Hollingsowrth Kids labels. To be honest they aren't like wow, but for me it makes me happy because it's a another step towards accomplishing my goals.

XoXo

Mandi

Throwback to Mother's Day

As you know, I have been feeling like a failure at this mothering thing so I wasn't really looking forward to this day. I love being a mother, I am slightly obsessed with [okay more than slightly] my child and I look forward to having many more kids but not being able to be more hands on really gets to me.

I rang in Mother's Day out at Ribbiz [a bar & lounge] for a friend's birthday. It was nice to be out especially since I don't do much of that, with work and all. Then the morning of, I was woken up by my cousin who brought me breakfast. Even though I really wanted to sleep some more, cause I had a slight hangover from the night before (mama not used to this going out biznaz), it was for food so it was all good. Soon after my son came home, yay!! He gave me my gift and we chilled all day in bed. I was still a bit exhausted so I fell back asleep. Unfortunately I had work so when I woke up it was a rush to get ready & be out of there. This would be the second time working on Mother's Day and like last year, I brought Jaz along with me. It's always great to have him around.

When we got back home, soon after, my Godmother & Godsisters came by and we all, (me, mom, them and my cousin) sat in the living room just chatting and laughing away. I love moments like that.

So as simple as my day was, I did enjoy it & appreciated all the Mother's Day messages I received. Also to top off the day, my "cousin" (not my real cousin but we grew up together) & his girlfriend (we went to school together) had their baby. He is so precious.

I hope all you mothers had a good day also. Isn't motherhood just a blessing???

OOTN (Bathroom selfie)

Me & the Birthday girl

My favourite mix (when I do drink); White rum & Coconut water

Breakfast in bed; Chocolate chip pancakes, scrambled eggs, corn muffin & hot chocolate

Jaz's gifts 

Me & my love muffin

At work with his leappad

There was homework to be done

Getting some loving

Piggy-back rides

Xoxo

Mandi

Oh beach how I have longed to see you

Yes I live in Jamaica & yes we are surrounded by the Caribbean Sea but I am also a workaholic so I hadn't been to the beach for over a year. Finally on Sunday I went with my dear supermama friend, her kids & cousins, my son and cousin. Some friends & their kids met up with us there. So it was kids, kids and more kids, with some sun, sea, sand and food. It was really just a great day. The only thing was that there was a lot of seaweed, I love the beach but I honestly HATE seaweed. It was a game of avoid the seaweed and I was loosing. I tried my hardest to move around them,  jumping and screaming every time I was touched by one, to everybody's amusement.When on shore, all I could do was sit, take in the HOT sun and stare off, watching everyone that passed, the kids as they played and looking out towards the sea. I was seriously at peace. Then there was the food. Nothing like some seafood.

Soaking up some sun

Best friends

Food time

He kept running back & forth following the water

Kisses for my mister 

Festival

I had started eating

Pepper shrimp

Oysters

Playing in the sand

Xoxo

Mandi

Moments

The following are some moments I enjoyed this past week.

A choke-hold from my kiddo while he napped

A nice refreshing bag of coconut water on a hot & crazy day.

Leaving my kids collection name on the glass of  Tea Tree Creperie 

Church with these ladies.

Brunch at Tea Tree Creperie; Smoked Marlin Crepe, Frozen Mint Lemonade & Chippes w/ Humus dip

Breakfast at Cafe Blue; Cappuccino w/ french vanilla & caramel & Bagel w/ cream cheese. 

XoXo

Mandi